a child's caprice

awww it was my birthday, nursery class, posing with dad:P

new years eve, mum tryng to handle all three of us together, :P my sis me and ma bro, and god knows y v both(me and sis) are wearing those lehangas :P i loved to dance after wearing it hahaaha

one of my bday parties, dts my best buddy in red and black freny :):*
thats my sisy and i, posing donno for what, but i have that fake smile, didnt know how to smile actually the natural one :p
my family,cousins, mom, taiji, and my traffic graphic dress,, not so clear though, thats me in front of that lady in orange, dts my mom:P

the green skirt dress i mentioned above, gosh, what was wrong with my taste then, :-s..with harsh bhaiya and jyotika (cousins) its rakshabanshan i reckon

wonder why i made that face?

these pics can be related to, after reading those lines with a few highlights :)
while cleaning up my old closet of memories today , i found an old TOYBOX :) and this is what i found in there..:

A plastic hammer, with which i used to hit every body, gosh, had those psychopath killer traits since then.

A bed sheet, which had a print f this big circle drawn in the very bottom, which i always used 2 fear falling in , as i thought it was a well.. ahahaha, how innocent we are as small babies.

A Blue teddy bear, who used to play a small drum, gawwddd,, my sissy never gave it to me.. but i always used to snatch it hehehawhaw (satanic traits).

My beloved doggys, Aster, scooby, lyka, candy :((((((((((((((((((( RIP u all...

A fish game, my uncle brought for my sister actually, which i was so fond of, that i once even went to my maid's house and got it back , as my mom gave it to her without my consent ( how could you do so mum, not fair )

A Pink granular, sweet smelling rubber ball, loved to sniff it , it had such a nice fragrance, which failed all the perfumes of Arab , used to admire it like anything..( what was wrong with me :P?)

An Ice cream applique dress,and traffic graphic dress, used to always look for a bus on myslef whenever i wore it :P i had plans to wear it till my last breath, it had to be hidden somewhere in some corner by my maid and mom,only then did i let it go....( fashion conscious , though now i am not).

OH how can i forget that yellow pencil case, it had this weird sliding mechanism , but my sister, she always used to lure me with some other special effects and as a fool i always used to fall a prey,,, (sigh)... never mind.

That Multi- colored Xylophone mommmmm why did you have to give it away to one of my cousins grrrrrrr......

its a little weird , is it not? every girl has this madness for a 'doll'' and i haven't mentioned mine as yet, well its IMPOSSIBLE, i was just taking a special time out for them :D

i had 8 dolls, which were baptized and named, they were mostly catholic , as i loved those english names, though i always used to name the servant barbie as ''sheela'' hahaha... madness , i remember, once one of my maid's daughters who must have been 4-5 years elder to me hardly, and a ''Bachelor in superstitions''( B.sc) told me that dolls came to life after 12.... creeppyyyy, and that night , after bidding them all goodnight, i said our holy chants, and did those mambo jumbo actions too, and slept so peacefully that those bad spirits are trapped now. (NOW that's a child's belief. :P)

one of the most integral parts of my toybox, is surely my bestest buddy, FRENY.. :*:*... she has been such a patient listener to my prattle, she should be awarded, surely.. i had those weirdest of ideas, of going to our favorite film star's house IN a , BOX... that would be our house, which will be a make shift one, stationed right in front of his gates, guess who???? Hrithik roshan :P..had hots for him, since he first came in kaho na pyar hai.

my list is yet not over:

Those erasers, bulb shaped, i remember that night i had turned the house upside down to get one of those, we even went to the market after 12, but it was obviously closed,( where was my common sense?)

That story book, which had kiri gami( type of origami in which cutting is allowed), it was just soo beautiful, each and every page i saw used to stand up to me, just loved watching it, and there was this story also about the fox and the rabbit, used to read it over and over again, as i loved it visuals...

Threptin biscuits!!!.. yummy.. sis and i just loved them, though it was a medicine but we never made it feel so, you see we are very warm people :D

That plush clown, which i never actually got , i still crave to have it but i left it as those days that soap used to come, WOH!! i got scared with clowns for a while:P

A few cassette tapes, specially, (whigfield, MJ, Diana keys, Britney spears......)

A whole bunch of old snaps, captured moments and beautiful memories :)

Oh my room and my cupboard, which held the poster of my Heartthrob, Leonardo Dicaprio... its like pressing a wrong nerve, i still have feelings for him :(..though i never let it out on my face :D

well my list will go on and on, and anyways many things are lost also now, from my toybox, but their memory and presence still lingers in my heart.

Lastly, my little idol of kanha:(.. which i lost not just once but twice, i know he is annoyed with me that's why he left me and went away.....heartbroken.

a pair of shoes...

• 
  

3rd september.... morning 10:30 am

Naina: ''Ramya wake up its 10:30..''

she opened her eyes at once, as if a scene from some movie was being shot, and Ramya had to open her eyes as Naina finished delivering her dialogue..

unlike her daily routine.. Ramya woke up, got ready, fought with the lift door of her society, which always gave her a tough time. Grabbed a quick breakfast from subway , caught a cab and left for lower parel, on the way she picked up , one of her friends, dhaanya.

Both of them studied in the same college, they had to go to lower parel , to meet a photographer, regarding their, styling shoot, as both of them were fashion students.

''its raining cats and dogs.. gosh.. i forgot to carry my umbrella", said Dhaanya.

''that's alright, anyways, we just have to meet him and come back, we don't have to roam or do any shopping.. in fact, we shouldn't , at least not me''.

That fear, that disappointment, that despair, had never left Ramya, since that day, when her father, left her mother and little Ramya just 4 months old, since then, her mother, Sunaina, could somehow, fulfill her only child's school dues and , with the help of her ancestral jwelry, she managed to get a MUTHOOTH finance loan, and that's how she managed to send her daughter to college.

It was pouring madly, on the town side streets of Mumbai. A very common sight in the monsoons. Both of them, alighted the cab, paid him off, and started moving toward the , old , dilapidated building, which read "MADAN MOHAN TOWERS''.

" godd.. don't tell me, this guy has his office here, in this ''kabootarkhana''.. he seems to be a well off person, at least , good enough to have a proper office" Dhaanya shrugged.

''Never judge a book by its cover '',... Ramya smiled.

The seven storied building , had a lift, which seemed to tell its age old tragic story, its door seemed to be in such a bad condition, that it would pin out of the walls, with a slight extra jerk. The sad condition of the lift, made the two damsels, take the stairs, they panted and reached the office, which was stationed on the 5th floor.

To their surprise, the door of the office,seemed to tell a much happy story than the lift, holding a name plate of '' JAMAL GUJRAL'' , they entered the stain glassed door.

The office was like a new born child , as compared to its mother, an elderly woman, who lost all its charm due to aging( probably it did'nt use OLAY age defying cream ).

"Excuse me, we would like to meet Mr. Gujral, we have an appointment".. inquired Ramya.

" I am very sorry ma'am , but Mr. Gujral is out , for a week, he left, for New York, early morning, on some urgent business calls''.

Both , Ramya and Dhaanya, gave disgusting, at the same time, disappointing looks to each other. With no other option left, both of them took a leave.

It didn't seem to stop raining at all, they decided to have a cup of tea at the nearby stall.

'' Hey, look at those bangles, ohh!! i so wanted to buy them since the farewell party, i had seen that, Monishka , wear them, hey please, lets go and have a look. P-L-E-A-S-EEEE"?? begged Dhaanya.

Ramya, always kept herself from falling a prey to the whole "shopping mania".. because she knew, how hard it was for her mother to manage even her daily expenses. But obviously, deep down inside, she always longed for so many things which she never got, one of them was, " a pair of shoes".. in her favorite color, green. A wish, a hope, which was so petty, when it came to the rest of the world, but in her own world, it was a dream come true.

Dhaanya, went from one shop to the other, then the next and so on and so forth. She shopped till she ran out of cash.

The day was breaking, with its regular speed and pace, the two girls, got mixed up in the whole bunch of shopaholics, it was late evening by now.

'' Wow, it was great only na? that silly photographer left, else we could have never gone for shopping".. Dhaanya said happily.

on the other side, sat, Ramya, with a sullen and pale face, peeping out of the window, with no comments or excitement.

"hey, why have you made that face now''? your new shoes are so pretty, aren't you happy? asked Dhaanya

"I can use those shoes''.. replied Ramya.

''Why ''? asked Dhaanya

''the money, from which i brought these shoes...''

''Ya what's with the money now''? Dhaanya asked, a little irritated now.

''My mom , got it after donating blood in the blood bank''....

it was that guilt, that lingered and their was only silence. On one side, was a girl , who never even bothered about the price, or the money, from where it came, and on one side was Ramya, a victim of circumstances, that money, was so precious, not because she was a needy person, but because, it was her mother's blood, buying just '' a pair of shoes'' can be such a big task?, such a big mistake?.. these questions, always lingered in the back of, Ramya's head... and those shoes.. never came out of the shoe box... just a pair of shoes..